War Liberal

2002-04-26T22:27:00.000-05:00

2002-04-26T14:38:00.000-05:00

WarLiberal.com

OK, This is my last post at this url. Warliberal.com is on the air now; well, your DNS server will possibly have to locate it, but at any rate in a day or two it will be up and running. Thanks to Michael for talking me through this.

2002-04-26T13:35:00.000-05:00

Hi. Theoretically, this will be my last post at this address. I'm still trying to figure out what I'm doing, but check in at warliberal.com and within a day or two I should be up there.

2002-04-26T13:03:00.000-05:00

DRAGNET'S BACK (AND THAT'S A FACT, MA'AM)

Dick "I Had One Good Idea, But It Was A Doozy" Wolf is planning to do an updated version of "Dragnet". Presumably, it will be like the original, only "gritty".

2002-04-26T12:48:00.000-05:00

Law may be sent to the Vatican

I would be remiss if I didn't point out that the technical term for this is the "St. Peter Principle".

2002-04-26T12:26:00.000-05:00

File13's Amish Tech Support

Ev has Saudi-bashing limericks! Actually, they bash just about everybody. A sample:

In his office surrounded by tanks
Arafat gave a moment of thanks
To the vermin and pests
That he treated like guests
Now he sits in the dark and just wanks

He also has the definitive comment on the death of Lisa Lopes of TLC. That is, probably just about everyone who knew her is secretly relieved. Starting with Andre Rison, I'd guess.

2002-04-26T11:45:00.000-05:00

THOU SHALT NOT GIVE A FIG ABOUT THE RIGHTS OF CRIMINAL DEFENDANTS.

Moore defends cutbacks in state courts as necessary

Alabama Chief Justice Roy "Moses" Moore -- presiding over a couple of cases in Birmingham, two hours from where the court usually is, but this was budgeted long ago, right -- claims that the courts can't afford to have jury trials. Of course, he also claims that homosexuals are evil and it's better for their children to be raised by abusers, so you kind of have to take everything he says with a grain of salt.

2002-04-26T11:38:00.000-05:00

War Liberal: Singularly dim!

Lee Ann objects to my post of a few days ago about profanity on TV. The short answer is that I have no objection to the PTCPWHWTMTOTHYTYBATKEOTKT exercising their free speech rights. I was just exercising my free speech rights to make fun of them, because I think they're upset over nothing. It's just words.

The long answer is that of course they have a right to complain about what's broadcast. At the same time, I have a right to complain about being shown bland garbage like Seventh Heaven, and the other shows targeted to the PTC demographic. My opinion is that there's plenty of room on the dial for everyone to have shows they like; the PTCPWHWTMTOTHYTYBATKEOTKT thinks that there's plenty of room on the dial for 100 different varieties of bland garbage.

The PTC crowd was instrumental in getting the V-Chip installed in all new television sets, and getting a ratings system in place for all shows. And then they ignored them and went back to calling for self-censorship.

There's a poll up at the PTC site. These are their candidates for favorite prime-time show:

Seventh Heaven [sucks], Sabrina The Teenage Witch [sucks, should have been cancelled years ago], Who Wants To Be A Millionaire [bor-ing!], My Wife And Kids [ditto, only added to get a "black show" on there], Touched by an Angel [sucks, bad theology], Doc [stars Billy Ray Cyrus, enough said], Malcolm In The Middle [outstanding], Other.

I'm sorry, Lee Ann, but I don't see how the PTC is fighting for "serious thought in an eloquent, mature manner" at all. It looks to me like they're trying to foist bland garbage on us. Throw in that their "current campaigns" include attempts to get the critically acclaimed "The Shield" and my favorite program of recent years, "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" thrown off the air (and will probably succeed in the former), and who is advocating censorship? How about when I add that the first thing you see when you go there is their campaign against a video game? There are lots of video games to choose from; they want to limit everyone else's choices, not add to their own.

Happy TV Turn-off Week, y'all. Is this what it feels like to be Gena?

2002-04-26T11:09:00.000-05:00

Eighteen Dead in German School Shooting (washingtonpost.com)

The eighteen includes the shooter; in my opinion, they should always be counted separately. At any rate, so much for gun control keeping this sort of thing from happening. It really doesn't seem to matter; Germany has tight gun control but weapons are smuggled in.

2002-04-26T11:02:00.000-05:00

Economy Grows at Sizzling 5.8 Percent Rate (washingtonpost.com)

Yikes. That's almost too good; it'll make Greenspan much more likely to raise interest rates.

2002-04-25T15:47:00.000-05:00

The New York Observer
Does Poison Le Pen Auger Yet Another European Darkness?

Ron Rosenbaum's last few pieces have been brilliant, but then again he's one of the finest American columnists going. He's not at all optimistic about Israel's long-term chances, and I am more and more in agreement. Israel will win a conventional war, but as soon as one of its enemies gets the bomb... I just don't see any way out of this.

2002-04-25T14:00:00.000-05:00

Building explosion in NYC injures up to 50

I can't take this anymore. I mean, when I read something and then I think, "Well, that's OK, nobody was killed." Or, "Well, this probably isn't a terrorist attack."

2002-04-25T12:30:00.000-05:00

What She Really Thinks
Ha, Nazi Schmazi

I just want to say that I, personally, am not surprised at all that Wehrner von Braun was a Nazi. I knew that. I just like to point it out periodically for the benefit of the people in Huntsville who think he was a frigging hero.

2002-04-25T12:23:00.000-05:00

Nominations, please

I'm now taking nominations for the singer we'd most like to be wounded by an animal. I'm throwing Celine Dion's hat into the ring to start.

2002-04-25T12:21:00.000-05:00

Palestinians Convict Four in Death of Israel's Tourism Minister

Nothing like due process, huh? Arrest to conviction in a matter of days. Of course, they'll be released quickly too.

2002-04-25T11:42:00.000-05:00

Prelates Back Ouster of 'Notorious' Clergy (washingtonpost.com)

As Steve Den Beste has said more elegantly than I could, this doesn't actually look like a new policy at all. Read straightforwardly, it looks like the exact policy that has been in place for decades; those priests whose abuses become public will be punished, but if it can be covered up, nothing happens.

I haven't been willing to say this, but I think we're this close to the first major schism in the Catholic Church since the Reformation. The Vatican simply doesn't seem to understand how important this is.

2002-04-25T11:38:00.000-05:00

U.S. Units Attacking Al Qaeda In Pakistan (washingtonpost.com)

This has been going on for weeks, apparently. It's a major step up; from fighting largely alongside Afghani rebels in a country gone chaotic, to fighting within the borders of a putative ally. I'm fairly certain we wouldn't be doing this without permission from the Musharraf government; whether the entire military and security apparatus is on board is doubtful.

2002-04-25T09:05:00.000-05:00

U.S. Supreme Court
ARKANSAS WRITERS' PROJECT, INC. v. RAGLAND, 481 U.S. 221 (1987)

Charles Kuffner points to this case, which looks to be on point for the Science Fiction Tax proposed by a Huntsville GOP Congressional candidate. And it would appear to be unconstititutional.

2002-04-25T08:41:00.000-05:00

Battle for the Senate Comes to the Prairie (washingtonpost.com)

Tom Daschle is possibly going to be very embarrassed this November. The Democrats, of course, have the slimmest of majorities in the Senate, and the Republicans want control back. And their focus apparently will be on unseating the junior Senator from Daschle's home state, Tim Johnson.

2002-04-25T08:35:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Zimbabwe land grab targets Asians - April 25, 2002

Here's an interesting point: CNN filed this in their "Asia-Pacific" section. Dumbasses.

Apparently, Mugabe and his thugs are running out of white farmers to abuse, and they're moving on to Asian -- that is, Zimbabweans of Indian or Pakistani heritage -- victims.

2002-04-25T08:31:00.000-05:00

Singer Jewel injured after being thrown from a horse

Those damn farm animals. Only a few weeks ago, Lyle Lovett was trampled by a bull. As for Jewel, this would be a good excuse for getting her teeth fixed.

2002-04-25T08:28:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Hubble data: Universe's age in galactic embers - April 24, 2002

It looks like the universe is probably closer to 13 billion years old; when I was in school, they said it was 15. Of course, Roy Moore will tell you it's 6000 years old, and he's the Chief Justice of the Alabama Supreme Court.

2002-04-24T15:49:00.000-05:00

Like Father, Like Sun

Here's an oddity... "Grady Olivier" is the guy who was writing weird insulting emails to Will Leitch when the latter was editing Steven Brill's "All-Star Newspaper". They're some of the funniest things I've ever read. (Leitch swears he didn't write them and doesn't know who did.) Anyway, "Olivier" has turned his attention to the New York Sun.

2002-04-24T13:40:00.000-05:00

Instapundit Imitations Department

Reader Jocob Helderman writes (re: Satanist student groups asking for their cut of the student-fees pie, see below):

I must confess that I have had a secret desire to see the "faith-based initiatives" thing expansively funded, just so Gary Bauer could make a speech at Bob Jones University in the days leading up to the South Carolina primary accusing President Bush of using tax dollars to fund Satanic Cults.

And why not? Faith is faith, right? To give the devil his due (pun intended) President Bush genuinely seems committed to ecumenicism. (Now, at any rate; his record on the subject when he was "young and irresponsible" was spotty to say the least.) I think he genuinely hasn't thought through all the implications of faith-based initiatives, and he and his advisers probably don't realize the true scope of religious faiths (not to mention the high absolute number of nonbelievers; even if the percentage is low the total number is in the millions) in the United States.

2002-04-24T13:12:00.000-05:00

Your one-stop shop for all news Krispy Kreme

Romenesko reports that the Minneapolis Star-Tribune had a story -- now removed from the site -- about the opening of a Krispy Kreme story in remotest Yankeedom. This isn't that unusual; what is is that the story apparently required four journalists to write.

Mm, doughnuts.

2002-04-24T12:07:00.000-05:00

Abstinence Moves to the Head of the Class (washingtonpost.com)

Do you ever feel like you're living in an alternate universe?

Kids are going to have sex; pretending that they're not is not only wilful blindness, it's counterproductive. The best thing you can do for them is to make sure they know what the consequences -- all the consequences, medical, social, economic, and psychological -- of sex can be.

Promoting ignorance as a solution to a problem is idiotic. When I was in (Catholic) high school, which was more years ago than I care to count, but not that long ago, I came across a study breaking down abortion rates by religion and denomination. The highest rate -- by far -- was among Catholics, despite that church's well-known record of opposition to abortion. And the reason why is pretty simple; with the church's ridiculous opposition to birth control, people were expected to abstain from sex. And, of course, they didn't, and unwanted pregnancies skyrocketed.

2002-04-24T11:48:00.000-05:00

Cardinals Adopt No-Tolerance Policy for Sex Abuse

Story says they will "dismiss any priest involved in a future sex abuse case". Does that mean they'll actually be thrown out of the clergy? During the John Paul II era, the Church has been very reluctant to allow priests to leave for any reason.

Oh, and gratuitous gay-bashing is prominently involved:

Cardinal Adam Maida of Detroit said behavioral scientists think ``it's not truly a pedophilia-type problem but a homosexual-type problem.'' He said bishops need to ``cope with and address'' the extent of a homosexual element in Catholic seminaries.

Until the Church is willing to face up to facts -- one of which is that pedophiles are generally not gay -- this problem will not be solved.

2002-04-24T11:33:00.000-05:00

Israel Balks at Probe By U.N. of Jenin Assault (washingtonpost.com)

Man, how dare Israel do this. It's not like the UN has long tradition of anti-Semitism, a major UN conference last year turned into a Jew-bashing orgy, or UN resolutions have essentially called the very existence of the state of Israel racist.

Or that the fact-finding team included a guy from the International Red Cross, which certainly isn't being anti-Semitic for not allowing the admission of Magen David Adom on the grounds that it won't use the Cross or Crescent. Or that UN envoy Terje Roed-Larsen already attacked Israel's actions in Jenin.

2002-04-24T10:51:00.000-05:00

The Brunching Shuttlecocks | The Apocalypse Drinking Game

Way things are going, we're gonna need this soon.

(Via Pop Culture Junk Mail, yet again.

2002-04-24T10:44:00.000-05:00

statesman.com | 'Scorpion' tale has no sting
'The Mummy' spinoff has the trappings of a summer action film: all brawn, no brains

On a related topic, I saw the tie-in documentary "The Real Scorpion King" on the History Channel last night. I've no idea if it was full of crap or not, but I came away with one sure piece of knowledge:

No matter who you are, no matter how successful, how powerful, how beloved you were, once you're dead, it's all out of your hands. You can be the father of Egyptian civilization, but that won't keep you from being played by a professional wrestler in a major motion picture.

2002-04-24T10:30:00.000-05:00

CNNSI.com - Pro Basketball - Basketball Hall of Fame nominee list has a 'Magic' feel - Wednesday April 24, 2002 11:13 AM

Magic Johnson is on the list of nominees for the HOF; he'll make it easily, of course. Hopefully, this won't spark another comeback. Also on the list is James Worthy, inexplicably rejected last year; it would be nice to see them go together, and I expect Magic will, once again, get an assist.

2002-04-24T10:23:00.000-05:00

Satanic student group seeks funding at UWO

There's no reason why they shouldn't. Christian organizations have been funded for years.

2002-04-24T10:19:00.000-05:00

Young heroin smuggling suspect to stand trial

Step forward, Prince Nnaedozie Umegbolu! You are the ten-millionth victim of the drug war! Your prize is an extended stay in a New York detention facility, to be followed by a life in ruins!

Jesus. This kid is twelve years old; he was used to smuggle two pounds of heroin from Nigeria in his stomach. Considering how difficult it is to get a 12-year-old to eat his spinach, does anyone in his right mind believe one will willingly swallow 87 condoms full of heroin?

2002-04-24T10:07:00.000-05:00

Kournikova nude photos landing in Penthouse

I'm just passing along information.

2002-04-24T09:57:00.000-05:00

Court crunch delays bombing trial

Once a man has escaped justice for 40 years, what's six months?

2002-04-24T09:54:00.000-05:00

TIME - Leon Jaroff - The Rocket Man's Dark Side

Wehrner von Braun, Huntsville area hero (the civic center is named for him), was an SS Colonel, and a full participant in the Holocaust.

2002-04-24T09:52:00.000-05:00

My Tax Dollars, But Probably Not Yours, At Work Department

City seeks dome funds

The city in question is Birmingham; they're asking the state for $5 million a year for 30 years to build a domed stadium. Why, I don't know. Alabama football won't play any games in Birmingham much longer, and UAB football is probably going to be shut down. Birmingham is in no position to attract an NFL team, and MLB would have no interest. Basically, it will be a huge waste of money. A bond issue to build the stadium was rejected by the voters a few years ago.

2002-04-24T09:47:00.000-05:00

Yahoo! News - Alabama Poised to Change Death Penalty Method

Yes, we still use the electric chair. And I use "the" advisedly; there's really the one chair, and it's decades old and doesn't work too well. Better than the one in Florida. Whether you believe in the death penalty or no, the use of electrocution always seemed to me to be a tacit admission that we wanted the condemned to suffer.

(Thanks to Lee Ann Morawski.)

2002-04-24T09:44:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Helms to undergo open-heart surgery - April 24, 2002

A couple years ago, I would have broken out the easy joke. You know, "Jesse has a heart?" But since he announced his retirement and stopped running for things, he's shown pretty clearly that he has one. I don't agree with him on much, but he's off the List.

2002-04-24T09:42:00.000-05:00

Your Tax Dollars At Work Department

TIME - Leon Jaroff - At the DOE, Dowsing for Dollars

I think there's some sort of competition going on in the government. The Health Department has its Office of Alternative Medicine, and that's a tough foe to defeat. DOE can't possibly waste that much money on pseudoscience -- well, not unless a few more cold fusion advocates make it to Congress -- so they're going to try to make up for it with something even more incredibly stupid. Enter dowsing.

You know, wandering around in the wilderness looking for things with a forked stick? Traditionally, it's water. The dirty little secret of dowsing is that if you dig far enough, you'll find at least a little water almost anywhere. If you're looking for something rare, you're better off consulting a geologist or looking at satellite photos.

2002-04-24T09:33:00.000-05:00

The Seattle Times: Local News: Expedition seeks paranormal pit

They're looking for a bottomless pit. But not just any bottomless pit. This is a magic bottomless pit that can bring animals back to life. They have a web page, of course. But I expect their bandwidth isn't bottomless.

2002-04-24T09:02:00.000-05:00

Airport Workers Charged In Sweep (washingtonpost.com)

More than 140 airport workers at the three DC-area airports have been indicted for lying on their applications. Either they had criminal records they didn't divulge, or they simply lied about their identity. I suppose it's nice they were caught, but it's more than half a year after 9-11!

Airport security is a joke.

2002-04-23T16:05:00.000-05:00

Oh, the Profanity! (washingtonpost.com)

People are cursing on TV, more and more; I'm on record as saying we're within a couple of years of the Unholy Grail: the F-bomb on scripted network TV. Pretty much everything else, word-wise, is a go. (Full frontal nudity may be further off, but Steven Bochco will be there!)

The difference between TV today and TV, say, twenty years ago, is pretty apparent; I won't say it's actually more realistic, but it's "grittier". Sitcoms today are probably harsher than dramas were prior to Hill Street Blues, and Hill Street, which premiered in 1979, looks positively tame next to its pseudo-sequel NYPD Blue, not to mention things like The Shield.

Predictably, the Parents Television Council of People Who Have Way Too Much Time On Their Hands, and You'd Think They'd Be Able To Keep an Eye On Their Kids Themselves (I of course made up all but the first three words) is upset:

"This is all about the coarsening of the culture, the dumbing down of America," said Melissa Caldwell, who conducted the PTC's research. "There used to be a stigma about using certain words. Unfortunately, those standards are eroding."

Oh, fuck off.

2002-04-23T15:33:00.000-05:00

Gates Says Windows Updates Threatened

You mean I might not have to spend an extra ninety bucks every couple of years to get my computer to run anything new? Darn.

2002-04-23T15:28:00.000-05:00

I see that I'm blogging to nobody, again, because Blogspot is vapor, again. At any rate, I have actually moved forward on getting a paid hosting service; I don't know when it will actually happen, but soon.

2002-04-23T14:53:00.000-05:00

Tampabay: Serial killer books to stay on shelves

Jeez, kids today. When I was in high school, most of us were more interested in continually checking out the books on illegal drugs.

2002-04-23T14:39:00.000-05:00

Strange things I've cataloged

Main Author: Moody, John,
Title: The masters of capital

Sounds like a neoconservative superhero group.

2002-04-23T14:31:00.000-05:00

Creek cleanup almost done

Three times this year -- that we know of -- coal-mining companies have "accidentally" released polluted water into waterways in Tuscaloosa County. The year isn't even a third over.

The good news is that if President Bush gets his way, this sort of thing will be perfectly legal. And you think I'm joking.

2002-04-23T13:49:00.000-05:00

Ad Report Card: Sermon on the Mountain Dew By Rob Walker

I have nothing to say about this article, but Meryl Yourish (happy anniversary!) suggested it. And gets a link.

2002-04-23T13:40:00.000-05:00

Court Sides With Government in Property Case (washingtonpost.com)

Basically, the property-rights crowd was told to take "takings" theory and shove it. 6-3 vote; no prize for guessing who the three were.

The particular issue was Lake Tahoe; property owners were barred from building on the lake shore because runoff would probably dirty the water. Keeping in mind that I'm an awful pinko anti-business enviro-Democrat who voted for Gore, this seems like an awfully sound decision to me. Here you have the property rights of a few landowners versus the rights of everyone else who enjoys the lake, and of the nation as a whole. Why should people have the right to pollute public property, much less other people's property?

It's a bad case for property-rights advocates, because of that; they would have been better off going after, say, the Endangered Species Act. I'm all for protecting ecological balance, but hardly anyone's life would be changed if the Great Smoky Mountains Spotted Ferret (animal species made up for comic effect) went extinct.

2002-04-23T12:31:00.000-05:00

ESPN.com - Page2 - Lies, Damned Lies and Hundreths

For those of you who missed it, Gregg Easterbrook's Tuesday Morning Quarterback has moved from Slate to Espn.com's Page Two. Page Two also has Bill Simmons, giving a one-two punch up there with Kurt Warner and Marshall Faulk. There's even a picture.

2002-04-23T12:22:00.000-05:00

4 detained for trying to stop
Ten Commandments cover-up

Judge tries to cover up plaque representing an unconstitutional establishment of religion; nutjobs go nuts. I, personally, would not cover up an 82-year-old plaque, but I'm pretty casual about this stuff.

"The Constitution says we have freedom of religion, not freedom from religion," he said. "The Ten Commandments are good for everybody."

As long as you're not an atheist. Or Hindu. Or Buddhist. Or...

2002-04-23T11:58:00.000-05:00

Top Bush Aide Resigning as White House Counselor (washingtonpost.com)

I'm obviously not privy to the ins and outs of the Bush Administration. But I wonder if Mindy Hughes found, once she got to Washington, that she wasn't that important anymore.

2002-04-23T10:36:00.000-05:00

Strange things I've cataloged

Main Author: Wrong, George McKinnon,
Title: The conquest of New France : a chronicle of the colonial wars

"George M. Wrong"? Is that a terrible name for a scholar or what? It's not quite as bad as major league pitcher Bob Walk, but it's up there.

2002-04-23T10:33:00.000-05:00

Montykins: Take That, Spam: IS SNNORING AFFECTING YOUR SLEEEP ?

Fear Snor-Gon!

2002-04-23T10:22:00.000-05:00

I Am Not Making This Up Department

Movie Preview: The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys

It's a comedy! With Jodie Foster, Kieran Culkin, and Vincent D'Onofrio. And animation by Todd "Curse you, Barry Bonds!" McFarlane. D'Onofrio plays -- I quote, and I am still not making this up -- "One of those priests".

2002-04-23T10:01:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Don't see Greenland for its polar bears - April 23, 2002

Tip for travel agents: tell your customers that they should go to see the penguins. They're tourists, they won't know that penguins are Antarctic.

2002-04-23T09:34:00.000-05:00

Yahoo! News - 'Jenny Jones' Saved From Axing

NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Die, damn you, die!

2002-04-23T09:30:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - 'Star Wars' could turn space into a wasteland - April 23, 2002

Says -- wait for it! -- the UN. Who would have guessed?

I think SDI is a giant boondoggle which will almost certainly never work cooked up by Republicans to enrich defense contractors. Who will funnel campaign contributions to the GOP. Which will come up with huge spending programs for defense contractors. And the cycle will continue until the only people in the country with any money left are defense contractors and GOP congressmen, which is clearly what the Founding Fathers intended. Other than that, I have no problem with it.

In a related story, "Star Wars: Episode 2" is likely to turn American cineplexes into a cultural wasteland for months.

2002-04-23T09:21:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Five-year-old girl used to smuggle heroin into U.S. - April 22, 2002

I figure Lifetime will be all over this one. A girl from Colombia was sent unaccompanied to New York, together with a kilo of heroin. (Actually, the headline kind of makes it look like she's a retired heroin smuggler; she "used" to smuggle it, when she was 3 and 4, but now she's moved on.)

2002-04-23T09:02:00.000-05:00

Genetically, Bison Don't Measure Up to Frontier Ancestors

Apparently, most herds have at least some members which are actually bison-cattle hybrids. The ancestor of domestic cattle was not native to North America, so (by the usual standards) the two are different species (as separate breeding populations).

2002-04-23T08:26:00.000-05:00

5th District GOP hopeful wants sci-fi to aid NASA
Williams sees tax on science fiction books as space funding solution

This is incredibly stupid, even for a Republican.

2002-04-23T08:24:00.000-05:00

Pope says sex abusers are criminals

Well, yes. He doesn't actually get to decide that, you know. Even in Italy. But he was actually pretty strong about it:

VATICAN CITY -- Pope John Paul II bluntly said sex abuse by priests in the United States "was rightly considered a crime by society," telling American cardinals on Tuesday that there was no place in religious life for abusers.

2002-04-23T08:20:00.000-05:00

Former porn star Linda Lovelace, 53,
dies from injuries in traffic accident

You know, in a way, if a porn star dies in a traffic accident, it's almost a victory. I mean, drugs and AIDS, those are practically natural causes.

2002-04-22T18:11:00.000-05:00

Guardian Unlimited Film | News | Academy condemns Oscar exaggerations

Creative Artists Agency took out ads congratulating its clients on nominations, even if they weren't actually nominated. I dunno. The Academy was pretty upset and took out an ad of its own.

"It seems prudent to nip this form of enthusiasm in the bud, lest CAA or another even more enthusiastic entity decide next year to celebrate its clients by awarding several dozen of them not just nominations, but actual Oscars, or congressional medals of honor, or Nobel prizes."

Maybe they should claim a Peace Prize. They seem to give those to everyone.

2002-04-22T16:14:00.000-05:00

War Now!

Bruce Hill calls a fascist a fascist. Message votes... If Le Pen is a message vote, the message is "Fifteen percent of the French are pretty much Nazis." Sure, the center parties are pretty awful, but that doesn't justify this.

2002-04-22T15:48:00.000-05:00

State ranked 1st in extinction of plant and animal species

WE'RE NUMBER ONE! WHOO-HOO! KISS OUR ASS, ALASKA!

Actually, this is probably a function of Alabama's geography. It's larger than most eastern states and has some of the the most varied geography; North Carolina is the only eastern state that comes to mind that might be more varied. And it's a "tall" state rather than a wide one, with a latitude about twice the longitude, meaning more of a spread in climate. It has a pretty good-sized river system (the Alabama and Tombigbee) all to itself and the northern part of the state includes part of an Ohio tributary (the Tennessee; most of the "Tennessee Valley" of TVA fame is in Alabama). All this leads to a large amount of biodiversity (rating fifth in the country, and the highest east of the Missisippi) and a high number of species to begin with is necessary to have a high number of extinct ones.

Scientists believe the largest single extinction event in modern North American history occurred when the Coosa River was dammed and its many fish, snail and mussel species were drowned, stranded or unable to reproduce.

Oh, dear. I used to live on Logan Martin Lake, one of those created by the damming. I feel kind of bad about it now.

Alabama's biological diversity often has been overlooked because it does not include many of the large, charismatic species that easily capture the public's affection, such as colorful wading birds or gigantic bison, Oberholster said.

Or tigers or elephants. I think we should import elephants... But seriously, that's a problem. The environmental movement in this country -- which is already thin on the ground in the south outside South Florida -- likes to put its efforts behind flashy species. Mussels and snails don't normally catch their fancy, and if they do don't get a lot of attention.

2002-04-22T15:26:00.000-05:00

Weird Things I've Cataloged

Main Author: Hacker, Andrew.
Title: The end of the American era.

Remember the days when books like these were around? This particular one was written in 1970, so I don't remember it, but I remember lots like it. It really wasn't that long ago that the gloom-and-doom contingent were the only people cleaning up the dough. Now... The 2000s, at least the early part, look more like the American Century than the 1900s.

I am delving into the bowels of American History right now. Most of the really old stuff is in, and basically everything after 1985 or so is in, but there's a heavy concentration of mostly Vietnam-era stuff I have to catalog. The golden age of depressing people.

2002-04-22T15:17:00.000-05:00

Bonet says no to 'Cosby Reunion'

This article is less than 100 words long, but it's probably the funniest thing I've read in weeks. The best part:

NEW YORK (AP) -- Lisa Bonet won't be part of the upcoming 'Cosby Show Reunion' next month.

NBC is saying it is because of her "busy schedule" that will keep the actress away from the show which airs on May 19th.

2002-04-22T12:59:00.000-05:00

Gunmen inside Church of Nativity exchange fire with Israelis

You know, for unarmed men asking sanctuary, they sure seem to have a lot of firepower.

Does the Church really want to continue saying that the priests and nuns inside the Church of the Nativity are not hostages? Because it seems to me that if they're not, they're allied with the gunmen.

2002-04-22T12:13:00.000-05:00

Moussaoui Accuses Lawyers of Conspiring to Kill Him (washingtonpost.com)

Hey, is it possible that the couscous-eating surrender monkey might be nuts? On the other hand, he fired the lawyers, so he's not crazy enough to want attorneys who want to kill him. On the other other hand, he's representing himself (he wants to hire a Muslim attorney, but his assets are frozen) and you know the line about that.

He's also praying to Allah to destroy the US and Israel. Which seems like a waste of prayer time to me. I mean, lots of people pray for the destruction of the US and/or Israel. If God was going to do that, he would have already. Why not pray for, say, the US to not execute you? I'm just saying.

"The United States will not have a trial without me," he said. "They only need me for the gas chamber."

Actually, I'm pretty sure that the Federal Government uses lethal injection.

2002-04-22T10:31:00.000-05:00

USS Clueless - Alabama grandstanding

The Captain has taken notice of the suspension of jury trials in Alabama, which actually went through on Friday -- I was in light posting mode then and didn't take notice. (Also, the local newscasters were more interested in auto racing this week.) Ray Mikell (who doesn't seem to have permalinks, and blogs top-to-bottom; go to the last entry) has also posted on this, and calls for the impeachment of Roy "Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's Ass" Moore.

It probably won't be all jury trials; major criminal trials will proceed for constitutional reasons. But if you're a burglar or bank robber or other relatively petty criminal, this is the time to do your business. (I use that phrase advisedly.) If you're caught, ask for a jury trial.

2002-04-22T09:54:00.000-05:00

Disease detectives: ABC experiments with CDC drama

Oh, why not?

At this rate, they're going to run out of government agencies and departments pretty soon.

2003: Customs
2004: D.O.E.
2005: Postmaster!
2006: Joe Collins, FDA Inspector
2007: SSA Theatre
2008: Price Supports

I especially like the last one, a tender drama about Natalie Price, who leaves her job in the insurance industry to take her father's old position in the Department of Agriculture.

Eventually, they'll run out of ideas and they'll have no choice but to make one about Congress.

2002-04-22T09:37:00.000-05:00

Hi, I'm Tonya Harding, andAAAIIIEEEE!!!!!!!! [CRASH].

2002-04-22T09:07:00.000-05:00

Google Runs Into Copyright Dispute

The Scientology-linking dispute hits the NYT... The unbelieveable arrogance of L. Ron Hubbard's con game proprietors never ceases to astound me.

2002-04-22T09:02:00.000-05:00

President to Use Earth Day to Sell Environmental Plan

Later, Yasser Arafat is going to use Yom Kippur to sell his peace initiative.

That is monumentally unfair to Bush, I realize, but come on. The man may practice some environmentalism on a small scale, but he is no friend to the environment at large. And on Earth Day, he should probably just shut up.

2002-04-22T08:39:00.000-05:00

Denver Post.com - Do libraries need lie detectors?

This is a thorny issue to say the least. And I don't know what the answer is. This article appears to be by someone on the right; if you want examples of false books from that side of the aisle, consider holocaust denial and other racist materials. Or creationist/"intelligent design" garbage. Those are a big problem in the library I work in; one book that circulates a lot around here is The Genesis Flood, and no, I won't link to that piece of crap. My general rule on the latter is to catalog anything like that as religion, even if the author wants to pretend they're science or history.

(Via Instantman.)

2002-04-22T08:14:00.000-05:00

Where Elections Depend On the Luck of the Draw (washingtonpost.com)

No, not Florida.

Apparently, in small Wisconsin communities, they break ties by drawing lots. How... biblical.

2002-04-22T08:11:00.000-05:00

Rainy days and Mondays

It's raining, thank God. Finally a break in this out-of-season HEAT. It hasn't been as bad, or as unusual, here as it is up north, but it's still oppressive.

2002-04-22T08:09:00.000-05:00

Protesters Arrested During Sit-In (washingtonpost.com)

There's a picture on the front page of the WP site with one of the usual dorks carrying a sign reading "Capitalism Must Be Destroyed" together with signs for peace, anarchy, and the environment. I'm wondering if this guy is really stupid enough to think that anarchy would be peaceful, or that if there were no controlling authority nobody would despoil the environment. I figure if there were anarchy, these guys would be the first to go.

I think we're seeing the end of the great overall protest movement that began in the fifties. In the beginning, they were protesting against racism, sexism, an unjust war. Now, they're just doing it to hear themselves. Or, possibly, smell themselves.

2002-04-21T13:42:00.000-05:00

Bush Policies Have Been Good to Energy Industry

In other news, horses are fast.

I mean, what did you expect? Two oil guys get elected, do you think they're going to call for energy taxes and solar power? Not that I'm advocating that myself, though the latter would be a good idea out west.

Sometimes he makes it too easy:

"I can assure the American people that mine is an administration that's not interested in gathering dust," Mr. Bush said.

"I'm more interested in spreading it throughout the atmosphere," he probably should have added.

2002-04-21T13:38:00.000-05:00

Pontiff Calls for Discipline In Clergy (washingtonpost.com)

I'm sure he means well. But he was speaking to Nigerian bishops concerning priests having sex with nuns. I'm not saying that this is true, but it presents the appearance that he's more concerned about that than the abuse of children.

2002-04-20T13:22:00.000-05:00

Alabama vaults to NCAA championship

In Women's Gymnastics, if anyone cares. With the football team given a bludgeoning by the NCAA, we're now a basketball/gymnastics school. The competition was held in Tuscaloosa, so it wasn't exactly fair, but I find I don't care.

2002-04-20T13:07:00.000-05:00

Electrolite: April 2002 Archives

I am so damned embarrassed. I didn't notice that Patrick Nielsen Hayden was nominated for a Hugo.

2002-04-20T12:33:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Northeast of U.S. quivers in rare quake - April 20, 2002

Is it me, or are things feeling increasingly like the end-time? I don't believe that, but if I were the sort of person who was likely to... It looks like we were lucky, here; this was a quake that could have caused "considerable damage", but nobody seems to have been hurt, and the damage seems mostly confined to roads.

2002-04-20T12:24:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Body found in rock singer's home in Seattle - April 20, 2002

A body has been removed from the University District residence of Layne Staley, the lead singer of the Seattle rock group Alice in Chains, a spokesman for the King County Sheriff's Department said Saturday.

It could be Staley's. The body is said to be "partially decomposed", ick.

2002-04-19T22:42:00.000-05:00

Hugo Nominees Announced

I don't read SF short stories very often, but I note that Allen Steele has a novella entitled "Stealing Alabama" nominated. "Once More, With Feeling", the Buffy musical episode, is up for an award, but it's against Lord of the Rings, so don't bet on it.

2002-04-19T22:33:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Sources: al Qaeda linked to bank threat - April 19, 2002

Potentially, suicide/homicide bombing (CNN uses the older phrase) would be part of a plan to attack financial institutions in the Northeast. That homicide bombers (in forms like we see in Israel, rather than the spectacular ones we're all too familiar with from September) would eventually appear in the US has been a given.

This information allegedly comes from Abu Zubaydah, the high-ranking al-Qaeda member captured some weeks ago. Apparently, he's singing like a little bearded canary. My theory was that the government was going to pretend he died, then use his information later, after people had forgotten about him. Another brilliant theory shot to hell.

Speaking in San Francisco, FBI Director Robert Mueller said people should be suspicious of individuals entering banks who "normally don't come into banks" and of "trucks parked alongside the building."

In other words, racial profiling away!

2002-04-19T22:07:00.000-05:00

Malnutrition, Disease Rampant at Prison for Taliban (washingtonpost.com)

This is the one in Afghanistan, and not under US control. But it's still our fault, of course: we're supposed to use our influence to resolve the problem. Everything is America's fault.

Meanwhile, the only people going hungry at Camp X-Ray are the ones on hunger strikes. But they were the ones everyone was all concerned about, until it turned out that the foreign press couldn't make their torture allegations stick.

2002-04-19T21:58:00.000-05:00

A brand-new blog, Robert Thompson's Liberal Imperialist, is now added.

2002-04-19T12:11:00.000-05:00

InstaPundit.Com

The Professor suggests that the administration (fresh off the change of "Suicide Bomber" to "Homicide Bomber") begin referring to Saudi Arabia as simply "Arabia".

Early on in this weblog, I tried to do just that. I eventually stopped, though. There were a number of reasons, but what comes to mind is:

1. "Arabia" is a geographical expression. The peninsula includes several states -- Oman, Qatar, Bahrain, the UAE -- who don't deserve to be tarred with the Saudi brush.

2. Talking about "Arabia" comes too close to comfort to talking about "Arabs". Any use of the phrase, unqualified, could easily be distorted to take in all Arabs.

2002-04-19T09:43:00.000-05:00

al.com: News Tutu: America led way for his nation

Desmond Tutu is in Birmingham this week; he's speaking at the Episcopal Cathedral Church of the Advent (I went to school there!) today. In a speech yesterday, he spoke of being inspired by the American civil rights movement. Birmingham, of course, was a big part of the civil rights epic. Anyone who doesn't think we've all come a long way... Desmond Tutu spoke in a Birmingham that has a black mayor, and this year's Birmingham International Festival is saluting a free South Africa.

2002-04-19T09:35:00.000-05:00

Bush Favors Dozens of Sites for Exploration

"Dammit, you may not let me dig up ANWR, but I'm gonna drill somewhere!"

The obsession with use of public lands -- including national parks -- for every sort of commercial use is troubling to say the least. I always thought that public lands were, you know, public property. Not a backdoor way to funnel cash to corporations.

2002-04-18T15:00:00.000-05:00

Thor Heyerdahl, Anthropologist and Adventurer, Is Dead at 87

I always thought of Heyerdahl as something of a crank; just because it's possible for one man (who knew where he was going!) to cross the ocean on a raft doesn't make large-scale ocean crossings at all likely. That there's no reason to think that Polynesia was settled from South America, or that there were any regular contacts there, is almost beside the point.

2002-04-18T14:18:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Studies: Global warming to worsen - April 18, 2002

There are three questions here. One is easily answered, the other two are out of my league.

1) Is global warming real?

Yes, no question.

2) Is it caused, wholly or in part, by humans?

No idea. The UN commissioned a study that seemed to indicate so, but long-term, pre-industrial trends already were headed towards warming. My guess is that carbon dioxide emissions are at least part, perhaps most, of the problem, but I'm no scientist.

3) Is there anything we can do about it?

Probably not directly without making things worse; if it is in part or in whole due to human influence, we could probably slow it. But even that isn't a given. The climate is amazingly complex, as I expect most people know by now.

There is one major problem that could be caused by global warming, the melting of the Greenland and particularly the Antarctic ice caps. Given the huge percentage of the world population that lives in low-lying areas, it's a potential disaster. On the other hand, we don't really know that large amounts of ice will melt. Some parts of Antarctica are warming, but others are actually cooling.

This story mentions a potential minor problem:

Zwiers, an author of the U.N. study, said a warmer world could have a number of affects on health. Even a couple of degrees could make some areas more hospitable to pests and insects that carry diseases, he said.

Or less hospitable to them. More likely, some areas more, some areas less. One thing I've noticed about people in the environmental movement (I am only a sympathizer) is that a lot of them can't believe that any change can be positive. If the whole world becomes warmer, some places will benefit immensely; Canada, Russia (especially Siberia) and southern Argentina would likely all see huge jumps in agricultural productivity, for example, through longer growing seasons.

Californians -- you may have noticed -- are overly represented in the environmental movement. I remember reading a lot of them saying that global warming would lead to a widespread drought. I never understood why, really; surely more heat would mean more water would evaporate? I think they were just using their own experience of Southern California's long drought. Me, I'm looking for monsoons.

2002-04-18T14:02:00.000-05:00

I am not a Catholic

I just post that for the guy who came in yesterday and told me that I was Catholic (three times, after I said I wasn't) and that the I supported the Pope, who was going to hell (I doubt it) and that the Pope supported "the faggots" who molested children (not true; also, most child molesters are straight) and that all Catholic priests are "faggots" (not true, and offensive to priests and to gays) and that I am "probably a faggot too" (not true, not that there's anything wrong with that) and that the Christian Church was formed by white supremicists who were trying to keep Africans in slavery (huh?) and that Jesus was a pagan god (not true) because his name in some languages sounds something like "Zeus". I think; he wasn't all that clear.

Yes, it was all pretty much one sentence, and took a half hour. I told him we had some nice literature on Buddhism if he wanted to try that out.

Also, at some point I said that Jesus was Jewish, and another patron heard me and was offended by that.

2002-04-18T13:48:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Rattlesnake roundup rattles rights groups - April 18, 2002

Say that five times fast.

I am, of course, an environmentalist. I believe in the balance of nature. But I don't have any particular problem with trying to get rid of poisonous snakes. And I hear the chili is delicious.

2002-04-18T13:45:00.000-05:00

protein wisdom

Jeff has a domain name problem today, but this link should get you in.

2002-04-18T13:40:00.000-05:00

CNN.com - Sources: bin Laden wounded in Tora Bora battle - April 18, 2002

Great, great. We actually hit the guy, and he still escapes. But if he really was at Tora Bora when the fighting started, that indicates he went to Pakistan, not Iran as some people have been pushing. Of course, he could be just about anywhere by now.

2002-04-18T13:29:00.000-05:00

House G.O.P. Moves to Make Tax Cuts Permanent

The tax cuts, which could be made without busting the Social Security budget only by calling them temporary? Surprise! The House Republicans were lying about that, they want them permanent.

Q. How can you tell if a member of the House Republican Leadership is lying?

A. His lips are moving.